drop toxic relationships

Person C again (after 2 weeks of hearing nothing): Hi there, wanna hang out?

Me: I get the feeling that I’m always hanging out with you on your financially difficult weekend (Person C gets paid fornightly)

Person C:.. I’ll check and call you back (click)

I felt guilty for being so blunt, but alas, I’m fed up really

I must have a sign on my forehead that says “Take me for granted. You know you want to”

Person C to me: Hey i lost my apartment keys. Can you please ring up for me to get a new one? I am really busy at work.
Me: oh ok, considering this is a new job of yours.
Person C: Oh can you also pay for it too? I dont have money
Me: ...

Two days later:

Person C to me: Hey can you do me a favour? I am going to a concert with my friend and i don’t have tickets. Can you go get tickets for me? you’ll have to go at your lunch and walk half an hour there, or you can catch a cab or a bus if you want. Oh and can you pay up front? I dont have money and I don’t have a credit card.
Me: .. oh… and your friends can’t get it for you? Considering this is NOTHING to do with me?

Three days later:

Personc C to me: Hi
Me: What’s up? Any more favours to ask? I’m broke

No more Person C! Yes!

Money leeching ‘friend’
said to me: “Oh I’m hungry why don’t we all go out and eat?”

Me: I’m not hungry actually, you guys go ahead

(5 minutes later)
Money leaching ‘friend’ to me: Have you cash on you?

I’m over this ‘pool in our money’ business – i am not a fool!

Apparently, ignoring them and denying them attention that they constantly seek is considered arrogant.. Bleh.
Also.. establishing personal boundaries with them is considered insensitive and unappreciative.

I’ve decided narcissistic personalities are too much hard work and am glad I am not a shrink!

I’ve become better at recognising a potentially toxic relationship before even entering it. It pays to observe more, ask more questions, and take more time before making a decision.. I used to fret over the possibility of passing up a good opportunity but now I think due diligence is a better option than making rash (aka emotional) decisions..

From an interview with Diana Krall
_“I’m quite shy.” (The default excuse of rude people.) _

(T says this ALL THE TIME)

Dinner with T – free since she cooked
Trip home – 60 bucks in a taxi(!!!)
Context of conversatin – T , her new watch, her job, her ambitions to work overseas. T , T and T.

Lesson learnt: PRICELESS

NO MORE.

There is a group gathering next week with T- am going to skillfully extract myself early so I don’t get tricked into staying at her place again and having to listen to dribble

For some reason everytime I see T I end up feeling used.. how odd

After ignoring T for many weeks I got a call from T today. As predicted it was about how tough her life is, how busy she was, how she was mistreated by those around her and how tired she was.

Now distance does seem to make the heart grow fonder,or whatever – normally it’s ‘hey you’ as an opening.. now I get ‘hi honey’ – a way to butter me up?

I am so over toxic people. Might change this goal to ‘I just want to be left the fuck alone!’

Phone bills to T ended up being close to 300 bucks. All for naught. A friendship really should go both ways. She wouldn’t even cook me a meal for all the times that I’ve emotionally supported her. Told her to stop rining me. See what happens

God! T asked me to help her rehearse for interview questions. I just couldn’t say no! I know she had a bad day at work and she wanted a new job.. and I know I really shouldn’t be wasting my time on her.. but alas, why did I agree to help her? I end up feeling even less fulfilled and used.. She got to pick my brain and dumped me when she was happy.. No more! I really have to be more aware of those that knows no bounds when it comes to taking from others!