Stop caring what other people think of me

I am such a stupid crazy living thing… I always wish to go to work on weekend to see this two co-workers that I am attracted to… I always wanted to get attentions from them if I don’t get it I feel miserable. On the weekday I always find out ways to impress them, checking their facebook and wait for them to go online and message me

I need to disillusion myself,
they are like my only passion and motivation
I need more life… omg

I am desperate to get attentions

I am so obsessed with it whenever people talk to me, share stuff with me, I feel my existence, I would give anything to be the center of attention.

my intuition told me that I should focus my life in different areas so I don’t starve for attention, but …........

I don’t care what it takes; I don’t mind people hating me, giving me attitude, harsh comments, ignoring me, dirty looks, beating me up etc…
because all these above only give me a short term pain; not like hiding myself, it is like a long term poison, killing your soul and draining ur energy slowly, I became dead body slowly.
When I realize it, I am already in my mid 20s, I lost all good teenager time. I will cherish my 20s!

A guy at work just open up to my friend but when he see me, he can totally ignore me and say hi to my friend instead. I can tell by the way he look at me, he feels uncomfortable with me, probably we are from very different background. I don’t know I guess you can’t force something to happen
I would just keep myself open up…

well you know what,
when things keep repeating, that mean you are not doing the right thing in changing yourself
stop thinking about shortcut/easy/comfortable way to change yourself, it won’t work and it causes frustrations

we are here because we have a strong desire in changing our life pattern which is already a habit in us, it is very important that you are doing the key thing to change yourself.

if you want someone to like u
u have to like the first
don’t try to buy them drink and expect they will treat u better
because when u do that . You are not liking them.
you just want to be liked
they will only think you are nice but fake and there will be no chemistry going on because you don’t like him/her in ur heart

If you want to have friends, believe that people are lovely, like them in your heart, and you will recieve the same treatment

I was so sleepy today before going to work so I took a nap and I kept praying I am going to relax at work and just let my truth self out
so when I got to work I felt little energetic and when I saw the coworker that I am afraid of. I said hi (with friendly body language) he became friendly to me
and there are two new coworker when my boss introduce them
I felt really friendly they shake my hand and talked a lot to me
I realize that ppl dun treat u bad if u treat yourself good
u become friendly to yourself everyone will look friendly to you

love yourself and u will get love
don’t force urself to change because u only need the one who like u
those who hate u
fuck it!

you know what …. i think it is very hard to not care. If you think about it at the beginning, it will be hard to tell myself not to care. Sometime I really don’t care and have that power in me, I feel the freedom and I can do whatever I want, it is effortless, I don’t need to think about it or convert myself, that power is just inside me. On the other hand, the more i try the more i care.