stop masturbating

1 week 1 day
taking it a day at a time is working. keep up the prayer cuz the temptation is slowly going away!!!!

This is going to seem irrelevant at first, but It will become relevant as I go.

I just got my braces off today (hooray). Now I remember that I got them on in August 2005, the month I turned 12 years old. I know that right around that time is when I started MBing and I was following the lie that it was normal. I remember now, six months in, feeling shame for how I was doing this vice and making fultile attempts to break free.

I have realized how far I have come since that time when I realized that MBing was wrong to do. I understand everyone here has come a long way since we believed that it was normal. I encourage everyone to keep going and keep hacking at freedom, no matter if it takes you 1 or a million tries. And as for all of the newbies, welcome, I as well as many other people here will help you in achieveing your goal.

-iamboomers4life

yes!!! i made it to the week marker!!! now if i can just get to the month ill be good. its so random but i will just have this urdge to do it but then i think whjat have i been working for and i got a girlfreind a week ago actually and if she ever ask me if i mastrubated while we have been going out i want to be able to proudly say no. so thanks guys for all the help and for being there. im still so mad cuz i had already had a week without it but i blew that a week ago when i was home alone sadly. (i got to get out more) and thancks gooddman777 keep prayin for me its helping.

Not much to say. I am still fighting the fight with all of you. Prayer, saying no and not being alone. Yeah yeah. I hope you all had a good thx giv.

So long six weeks two days.

Day 1 is over.

This is going to be a LONG read, so brace yourselves..

My one-week Thanksgiving break is coming to an end.. it’s Sunday, my least favorite day ever, but I’ve got a new attitude..

November 24 was the day I had stopped masturbating all together last year. I just can’t stop reminiscing about how proud I was of myself and how I recovered the best way I could. Now I’ve broken that by masturbating on November 28.. so I’ve plagued myself with the problem for well over a year now. God, I’m so mad at myself, even though I knew I would eventually screw up.

So the break was a little boring. I do what I always do when I’m at home for long periods of time: waste time on the computer, watch recorded episodes of George Lopez, Monday Night Raw or Drake & Josh, eat, and go to sleep at about 1:30 AM. It’s not particularly glamorous, and I want to alter my lifestyle for a few very good reasons. There’s a lot of unneeded crap in my life that I bring (and have brought) upon myself, in order of relevance to the topic.

- Stop masturbating and stop looking at porn. I was originally going to make these two separate topics, but they’re so closely related that it wouldn’t be worth it. Whether it’s a softcore YouTube video or some mass pervery on a porn-sharing site, it’s just a leviathan that’s hard to battle against or classify. It seems as if I’ve lost my tolerance and/or sense of right from wrong. While I could easily block out and override pornographic thoughts a year ago, when I first got over masturbating, even low-key sexual thoughts or a quick little flashback from a porn video is enough to send me into a confusing torrent of arousal and denial nowadays. It persuades me to seek out more porn and nullify the lust. According to a site I’ve visited, this is a horrible balance. Unfortunately I don’t remember if they mentioned a solution to it..

Bottom line is, porn is a horrible thing that I can’t control myself over. I always find it somehow and I think it has legitimately ruined me. I can disable the blocker any time I want. I know I’m in a further stage of puberty, but that should not be an excuse for having this voracious appetite for pornography. It seems like no matter how many flaws and sick anomalies I can associate porn with, it comes back with a vengeance- and yet again I’m caught with a dick in my hand and no option to turn back.

I haven’t made any attempts to fight the urge with a cocky swagger, like last year. I’m spending too much time whining about how vulnerable I am to porn and its harmful effects and making no effort to actually kill these temptations once and for all.. or maybe I am fighting back and I just don’t realize it, because it’s so damn difficult this time around. I know the problem, I know the solution, but for some reason, it always backfires. Always!

- I also want to get into the habit of losing weight, gaining muscle, and being more satisfied with my appearance. I feel as if I’m way too spoiled by my computer and all my other amenities in my house.. I never go outside when I stay home, even though I know how much a good jog can refresh the memory, thanks to those of you who recommend it. It’s really my fault for being a lazy bastard. At least I can say that without being self-discriminatory, because it is indeed true. I never try hard enough and I’m spoiled rotten, but I never do anything to actually deserve that spoiling. Which brings up my next topic..

- Do better in school. Again, that at-home distraction always comes in. Instead of making study habits, trying harder, and doing all my work with flying colors, I’m wasting time on the internet and watching TV. Wasteful stuff like this always comes back to haunt me even though I make no effort to better myself. I’m always doing a half-assed job and piddling along in math class or language arts with a B- or lower. And Lord knows how mad my mom gets when I don’t do well it math class. Hell, I have a bunch of unfinished assignments I should have done the day my break started, so I wouldn’t have to worry about the crap later.

- Brushing my teeth more often. Yeah, I always come back from the dentist with a not-so-good report and some pissed parents. I’m always getting into the teeth-brushing phase after a dental trip, but I lose determination after a few weeks and then get back to my lazy habit of once every school day. Yeah, I know it’s disgusting.

- Stop drooling in my sleep. This is loosely tied to brushing more often because I think it’s an offshoot of that. I’ve always slept on my side, and it hasn’t been until earlier this year that I started drooling on my pillow. God, it’s disgusting and I’m tired of waking up face-first in a smelly puddle of saliva and having to clean my bed every morning.

- Stop trying to be Joey Smartass. I’m proud of my infinitely expanding vocabulary and enjoy watching people on the Internet outsmart others, but I think I should stop it. It makes me feel like I’m trying to be better than everyone else, but it never really benefits me at all. It makes me get all poetic, second-guessing myself and shit when I’m feeling tempted. Last year I didn’t do all this shit, I just dealt with a problem like anyone else would.

- Get out of the fighting scene (i.e. MMA, puroresu, and so on.) Seeing all these badasses wail on each other makes me want to pick fights with people and see if I could match up to the prowess of CroCop or maybe Kenta Kobayashi. I think I would just get what I deserve and get my ass kicked by the bigger, faster, more popular kids. So I’m gonna stop that garbage.

I think the point is I’m taking life much more seriously than before and getting dramatic with everything. I don’t really have any role models and I’m confused about what I want to do with my life, and I really just want to filter out all the negativity in my life- instead of arguing with some imaginary smartass and making my own life harder.

Tomorrow is the start of December- the best month ever.

Don’t start none, won’t be none!

I actually accidently stopped counting how many days its been now, but I’m writing to ask for support. Could you all please pray for me? I’m having alot of difficulty managing temptation lately, and I need help. Life has got a little boring lately, and I think that’s why, but I’m not really sure. Either any advice and could you please pray for me that would be so great!

Of course, don’t get me wrong. I’m still very happy and very anti-mastrubation. But if I wasn’t I know for a fact I would have give in. So I was just wondering, honestly, any advice? Thanks in advance, and God bless!

Check out my entries, my story (I posted a short how-to just now) and call me crazy, but I finally succeeded in stopping. AND I AM HAPPY!

Hi just wanted to update in my progress now i’ve been 4 days, today is the 5th (would of been 15 days if i didnt broke my 11 day streak, 4 days ago ). I’m doing great , hardest days start at the 8th day for me. Hopefully next time i post i’ll be able to say the temptation is no longer affecting me, 17 days to go…, hopefully thanks to God i’ll be able to :).

Thanks God for carrying me this far. No success can be attributed to me. In that I stay broken and humble he carries me and lifts me. I have been attacked by guilt, intrusive images, pain, insomnia, depression, all the rest of it, but I won’t look back because he is worthy.