Be less introverted

I’ve really come out of my shell in the last 2 years – starting to socialise with other people like a normal human being! So this is done and dusted!

Most of the time I think I would be perfectly content to go through life with minimal human interaction. Other times I get lonely and think I should make more of an effort.

This is no longer a priority for me. My quest to achieve non-duality has reached a point where I no longer care about the night life, status, trying to prove something to people, gossip, and many of the things of the material world and pop-culture that people take for granted.

If I do happen to find a woman, she’d have to be on a spiritual journey with a similar introverted nature for the relationship to work. My silent contemplative nature suits me. Peace. :)

well, today i went out with my friends for supper, cool right? well, not cool, cos i spent the entire evening staring at bottles of coloured water on the shelves. i was completely uninterested in the conversation. i really just want to be alone like all the time, and it’s not healthy. sure i’m suffering from a broken heart but i’m totally withdrawing, i need to be the person that i used to be. i miss her, because more people accepted her.

This goal may be a surprise to some, or make sense to others. It all depends on how you met me. If you first met me in a group of friends in a familiar environment, you would say I am an extrovert and outgoing. If you met me on a bus, or at a coffee shop, you would see me as an introvert and very shy.

Either way, I am inherently an introvert, with a little extrovert mixed in. I’m actually OK with who I am, I don’t always like to talk non-stop and be the center of attention. But I believe I’m missing out on people’s lives and experiences. Each person has a story to tell and an adventure they are on.

I don’t yet know how I will accomplish this, but adding this goal to my list is a first step. I would love to be able to have a meaningful conversation with a random stranger. Time to step out of my comfort zone…

It’s a combination of several things. First, I was picked on an awful lot in grade school and middle school and it made me realize that I’m probably going to have to get used to being alone, so that’s what I started trying to do. Also, academics were holding my social life back in high school and college. I had no problems understanding most of the material, but it took me longer to work on it than almost everybody because my mind would wander so much, so I was spending 6 hours a day at school and 10 hours a day on homework, so that didn’t leave any time for socializing. Another thing is that I’m TERRIBLE at conversations, sometimes even if I feel that I relate to a person well. I often find myself thinking “What the hell is there to say?”, and sometimes people think I’m ignoring them when I’m really not. I wish that I was better at that stuff. All of the above things combined kinda got me into an introverted lifestyle. Sometimes I wish I could ’’snap out of it’’, because I get kinda lonely sometimes. I’m still living with my parents, so I do have them for company for now, but I won’t be able to do that forever. Hopefully I can get better at that conversation stuff if I practice it.

saying the hell with everything. Keep your heartfelt values and goals but let the crap society has tried to confine you in disappear.

escaping within the confines of my own mind all the time can pose it’s share of problems… but in general, I prefer peace and serenity to loudness and excitement… I don’t believe that will ever change, period… I will probably always be an introvert.. with no desire for friends, only a soul mate.

It’s not the introversion, but the insecurities that come along with it, that I want to transcend, and I will, the final outcome is not in question.. how long it takes however, might be.

I’m coming closer to reaching this goal (especially with my random conversations with people on the street) but in daily life, I need to be less “in my head” and be more aware of what’s going on around me.